#Word

2014 (1) Nike Attitude

Here I am again in front a blank screen for a blank blog post that should soon be filled with witty and charming tales of my daily meandering around. The last time I hit "publish" on this blog was back in August, and even then several posts begin with a sincere apology for my absence since I know (hope) that the tiny little things I write inspire something (laughter, thoughtfulness...etc.) in those who read. This isn't the first time I've sat in front of this screen between my last post and now, it's just the time that I've decided to suck it up and write, the longer you prolong it the guiltier you'll feel. So here I am. I know it's not totally rational that I feel guilty when not writing things in my blog, and of course seeing things like this makes it even more sad.

2014 (0)

This blog started slow because I was crazy in my senior year of college, and I didn't really have time to fit in blogging in the mere 24 hours that we have in a day. Jump to my first year in Spain lots of posts leading up to my departure and the several (mis)adventures that popped up along the way. I was also churning out a lot of posts because I involved myself heavily in the blogging community, and wanted to give my readers something worth coming back to my page for. When I found my niche in Spain, it left less time for me to be blogging about the things I was doing, and instead I was just doing them. Comments and readers dwindled and so did the posting. Now we are in 2014, and I'm not really sure what the fate of this blog is. I don't think I have the heart to close it down completely, because it does give me a space to share my thoughts in a different way than I can on facebook and/or twitter, but I am not quite sure I have the same aspiration I did 3 years ago with having a super popular famous blog where everyone reads it, and not only my family. Even though there is a high number of page views on my blog I'm sure 80% of them are spambots from Russia. I also want to keep writing because I am a bit of a nostalgic person and having something to go back to is important.

It's funny though, I really thought that by living in rural Spain I'd write so much more! There weren't going to be lots of distractions like activities and lots of friends that I had in Madrid, and even a fellow writer friend of mine told me that what a lot of writers want is the time and space to write. That's what I got lots of time and plenty of quiet moments to just sit with a pen and a pad (or a blank blog screen) and just let the words flow from my brain to the page. It hasn't happened quite as I'd planned. I haven't been completely dry on the writing block. My poetry blog has had a few entries, and I'm excited that my Spanish skills are evolving to a place where I can write poems that aren't half bad.

I think part of my lack of motivation/ inspiration is partly due to this "fish out of water" feeling I sometimes have in my current place of living. I hadn't anticipated missing Madrid as much as I do, now that I am so close yet so far, and that in turn has occasionally not really allowed me to connect with the place that I live. It doesn't help that I commute to work so the friends I make at work are far away, and the friends I have where I live I can count on one hand (yeah, it could be much worse--- I've been much worse, but it's my blog and I'll cry if I want to :P ). It doesn't help that I have several moments like this in Navalmoral de la Mata, but I'm growing and learning to not shut down because of it.

But I guess with all things you want to accomplish you kinda have to put yourself in the Nike attitude (Just do it!) So that's what I'm doing--- Just do it (write!) Just do it (be happy!) Just do it (clean your room!... well) lol. I think it has also really helped me to take part in the #100HappyDays challenge. If you're curious to see what it is take a look at my fb album and check out www.100happydays.com.

That's all for now, let's hope you'll be reading me again soon! <3

Ciao Ciao

@CathyArely

Made for the Movies!

Yep that's right people I'm gonna be famous...or at least that's my hope...sort of. Actually, I don't know what I want lol.

It's kind of funny you don't know what kind of impact you're going to have on the world. My knack for being in different things has always gotten me some sort of recognition even if it's just people remembering my face, coming from a small town helps too. My recent brush with fame actually came from this blog. I was walking into the metro, and this girl goes "I'm sorry to bother you, but are you Cathy?" This definitely caught me off guard since this was Madrid not the Antelope Valley or even CSUN. I warily said yes, and the girl told me that her friend was like my biggest fan, and that she couldn't wait to tell him that she ran into me. Definitely a good boost of self esteem. Also a very good friend of mine showcased me on her blog with one of my latest. So for those fans out there I'll apologize again for my lack of posting updates.

For a long time I've said that I wanted to be that kind of inspirational person that they make a movie about the impact that they've made. What really interests me is the movies like Freedom Writers, Coach Carter, or Stand and Deliver is the influence that these people have made,and that people think that that influence is important. With all of the struggles I've had to overcome in these last (almost) 6 months, it made me laugh at the fact that for so long I've had that dream, but I never really took into account the trials part of it all lol. 

Anyway, in the mean time feel free to check out our New Reader Spotlight for Feb/ March or some CathyBean Poetry. I'll leave you all with a new photo of me and my new haircut. Future famous person, or lawyer, or teacher, or poet, or singer, or comedienne, or whatever else may come my way.

Thanks for reading!

~Cathy

Out with the old and in with the New... Welcome 2012

Hey Hey Everyone!

   Hope everyone rang in the New Year in a good place with those you care about :). I'm sorry for the lack of posts (blog/facebook/otherwise), I guess I just kinda figured that since nothing positive was going on, I didn't want to keep putting negative vibes out there.

2011 wasn't just about negative vibes, actually a lot of super fantabulous things happened during 2011. As I read  through my blog throughout the past year, I found myself surprised at how eloquent at times I can sound (and modest, I know). 

My first blog post of the year called it a transition, and I couldn't agree more (with myself haha). Such an eventful year, I was La Presidenta, visited NYC for the first time, graduated from college, moved to a foreign country, got pretty much kicked out of my apartment, found wonderful amazing new friends while reconnected with old ones, and got to know the wonders of the the Spanish healthcare system. 

Despite the clouds and the bad luck that may have shadowed the tail end of 2011, I still consider it to be a great and inspirational year. Not only did I accomplish a goal I'd been working toward since the age of 5, I also found a new outlook on life. I'm at a crossroads considering options I would have never thought would be in play.

This blog for example has come SOO far in the past year, and has given me ambitions to do things, that I perhaps would have found silly in the past. At the beginning I had 2 followers 250 views, and 3 comments...and I'm very proud of what this has become/is becoming. This blog has inspired me to keep writing, in more ways than  one. 

Many thanks to our spotlights of 2011- Kenya, Jackie, Crystal, and Kathy. Remember new month means first comment gets go be the spotlight. I hope my idea is allowing there to be a semi community here on my blog. 

I'm going to keep this short because we have the whole rest of 2012 to keep chatting it up. Just the mini  update for those of you who are concerned, I started physical therapy today for my back. It is still difficult to walk, but hopefully its a step in the right direction to getting the real Cathy back.

Much love to all my readers, here's to seeing more of a good 2012

<3 Cat

A Little About Me

Hey Hey all,

So I recorded a new poem to go with my A Little About Me section of my blog. Check it out <3

~Cat

4 Walls

Hey Hey all,

   So as I lay here tying up loose ends getting ready to transport myself from one room to the next room, I thought I'd share a recent work of mine that I did for a project called APOEM (A Piece of Everyone's Mind), which is a spoken word group where people call out others and give them topics for the poem they post the next day. 

    So I've written poetry before, but this was my first attempt at spoken word, and as I explained to my friend the other day in the analogy-- I sing, but I've never rapped before. So without further ado here's my poem, be nice lol.

What is a room, but 4 walls that hold together the meaning of my existence? 

Or nonexistence…

Memories of bouncing on a bed so high it’s like you’re floating on a cloud

Floating away into space

A space, A place where my treasures are held.

Or were held…

Take a deep breath and intake the aroma of coconut lotion and Britney Spear’s fantasy.

A fantasy of being SOMEONE out there in the big bad world.

Without a room but two small suitcases more like cannons filled with clothes and shoes.

Shoes that walk the path unseen 6000 miles to four more walls.

In my mind and on my shelves are the things worth remembering, and the forgotten.

Pass your fingers across the dust on a library of knowledge and emotions over days months and years gone by

And just gone.

Stop and listen closely to the beats these four walls have heard from Pitbull to Phantom of the Opera.

Not forgetting to let the beat rock or bed rock.

Cramming and jamming off the walls into the headphones of my portable mp3 player.

5 senses minus one leaves four.

Taking them all in or all out.

There is no room to be called mine

Except in my mind, which has more walls than four

And the epitome of my international existence.

Thanks for reading/listening/watching! Next broadcast will be from my new home!

~Cat

Pay it Forward

An old man once said, "There comes a time in your life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh. Forget the bad, and focus on the good. Love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don't. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living"

       This is the quote that serves as the motivation for this post. This was a quote I stumbled upon when I was browsing through my friend's blog. You see I am a big fan of quotes that are inspiring or motivating or just strike out some kind of meaning and/or emotion. I liked this quote in particular, because it's a good reminder not to sweat the small stuff and see the good things that life has to offer. So like I often do I post these things as a status on my facebook to share with my 1500+ friends. I share things because I figure, if  this (insert quote/link/photo..etc. here) made me smile, laugh, ponder, or reminisce then chances are one them will too.

     What I didn't count on is so many people reading and relating to this particular post. As I said before I share and post a lot of things I find interesting and they often get lost in translation in the traffic that makes up the facebook community, but this particular quote got more "likes" than even my status' regarding my diploma, or Spain acceptance. Now I know this probably has to do with this post doing more with humanity than my pride in my accomplishments lol. 

    So beyond the extraordinary amount of "like" notifications I was receiving on my page, came the extraordinary comment that reminded me why posting such things are for good. The comment went like this

"Wow I can't believe this right now.. im having a horrible day based on everything this message says and I thank u for posting it because u didn't know it but this has turned my day around for the better. I have to live by this. im so down, I cried when I read it."

     How powerful is it that something that I posted merely from my own interest and entertainment can I turn around and effect someone else miles and miles away from me, whom I haven't spoken with in years, and yet this simple action, had a great reaction. I felt really happy to hear this from her because it makes me think that I'm doing something right, no matter how insignificant. It actually kinda felt like one of those moments on tv when the teenager is like "blah blah blah...I don't matter" and some kind of supernatural action allows them to see how different the world is without them, and shows them their significance in life. Lol I know now the world would be different without me! haha just kidding ;)

     I guess that just another example to prove how social networking and today's age where everyone is watching what you say and do, allowing us to be connected in ways that we don't even realize.

Thanks for reading! Feel free to leave your thoughts, your favorite inspirational quote (you never know who's day it'll brighten). Comments are always appreciated <3

Much Love
Until Next Time
~Cat

Past-Roots, Present-Life, and Future-Seeds...always intertwined

Hey Hey all!

So I think this is good, within 10 days of my last post I'm creating a new one (go me!) lol actually I was inspired to do this post a few days ago, but alas the calling needs of the PRESENT at times prove to be an obstacle.

What actually inspired this was a conversation that I had with my abuelita (grandmother). She was telling me about her life in El Salvador. She shared with me things that I hadn't known before. What stuck out the most to me, is that she was telling me stories about when she was La Presidenta for the board of her community, San Vicente. She had also been a leader in the church. She was someone who spent time raising funds for good causes, helping out people who needed it. This struck me because it shed light onto where my ambitions come from. I always knew that my family supports me in my endeavors, even as crazy as they seem. What I failed to realize is that perhaps my knack for leading isn't something that just sprouted out of nowhere because I thought it was a good idea, it was something that was in my blood my PAST driving the FUTURE.

There are so many more stories that I'd like to get out of my family before it is too late, although I am scared to, because I know it can provoke horrible memories of a tragic time in a place where some of my raíces-roots come from. This semester I took a Central American Studies class and reading about stories from that area, just makes me more hungry for that personal history. I need to know those stories, so that I can pass them down to my children, and grandchildren, and make sure they know their raíces. I'll find the courage to one day open that Pandora's box, I guess I just need to figure out the right way to do it without unleashing too many demons.

Speaking of demons... lol Last week was a very tough week. At the courthouse there was a situation that made me upset, because I felt helpless against the system in order to help one of the many people who come to see us there. Even after it was all over my body still felt tense and upset, for the rest of the evening. To make matters worse, that day I received a letter from CSUN stating that I hadn't completed the requirements to graduate. Right there stress levels through the roof, rant all up on my fb page, makin' phone calls trying to get business handled. After a trip to the valley, a few phone calls, and emails later, I can say my diploma's in the mail! Just waiting for me to rock the FUTURE and show the world what I can do as ALUMNI.


So I guess what I'm going to take from all of this is that from the roots grows what life may be, from there we bask in the fruit life gives us, and leave the seeds to replenish our future--lol I guess I'm feeling a little extra poetic today.

Thanks for reading. Comments are always appreciated :)

<3 Cat

Happy International Women's Day :)

It makes me sad to see that the last entry that I made for my blog was one month ago, but I am here now and that's what matters.

It's so funny how in such a short amount of time, so much can happen.

When I was in 2nd grade (this is not the short amount of time I'm talking about haha), I decided that I wanted to be an elementary school teacher. I had great role models, and explaining things to people seemed to be something that came with ease to me, and I enjoy helping people. So that was the plan that I stuck with, a plan that held its ground til about a year ago. Since then I have been toying around with becoming a Spanish professor, working in student affairs, and my latest intrigue....Law School.

I would have never imagined that I would be seriously considering law school, but several factors have played into this being a very viable option for me. My mentor, has been a tremendous help in giving me the tools that I need for networking, and getting to know people that will allow me to help people. We even had lunch with the Dean of UCLA law school!! (crazy, right? She's wonderful by the way...) Having that support system really makes things possible that at one point or another seemed impossible.

Another part of that support system that plays into this revelation are the peers that I have. A friend from high school and a few others from college are going along with the same processes that I am, so being able to talk to each other about it and help each other out is awesome.

Right now I am just waiting patiently to see if in September I will be preparing lesson plans in Spain or if I will preparing to take the LSAT or GRE or who knows. It's nerve-wracking to not know what lies ahead in the future. It would be nice if things were like in the 2nd grade, and I could make a plan right now that would last another 15 years with no worries.

As nervous as all of this mess is, there is excitement in the air. I'm beyond ready to meet these new challenges ahead and learn from all of those people who are willing to teach me. For 100 years we have been celebrating International Women's Day, and today this woman is looking ahead and taking a step forward.

Thanks for reading! Comments are always appreciated <3 ~Cat P/S: If you're not on LinkedIn already, you should be...professional networking...DO IT! http://www.linkedin.com/in/cathysmith88

Flashback

Super short post today...remembering a love that couldn't blossom into what it could have been. Siempre en mente...Have a great day everyone. Comments are always appreciated.

My Song

The beginning
A start
The first night I met you
You had my heart
That wonderful night
Come and gone
I thought it was only a memory
Like a really good song
An unexpected turn
In front of my eyes you are
My heart is full
Amazed at the moments we shared under the stars
Thats where it stays
Where the song remains
Too shy to pull forward
To pursue any gain
Long, hot days
Daydreaming of you
With a hopeful heart
That I was on your mind too
Saving this love
For you to enjoy
Pero cuando es tiempo
Sola estoy
Letting the memory fade away
With the tune playing faintly in the back of my head
Trying to move on
But getting lost in the music instead
A cold icy night
Like the blink of an eye
The cd is thrown out
No more chances to try
The song is over
The world is listening to something new
Now that I'm not under this blanket
I can finally hear it too
My music is a good memory
For now, A fairy tale turned tragedy
The quest is on again
For another sweet melody

2011- A Transitional Year

Hey all,

I'm sorry for being away for so long (not that I really have a following anyway... lol) but the good news is that it's a new year, which means new opportunities to seize, new adventures to have, and new lessons to be learned. I know I've said this in the past, about how I am going to write more in this blog, keeping the world updated on what's going on in my mind, but for reals this time (lol) this year I am going to give myself that extra push to document myself in what is what I call a transitional year.

Why Transitional?

The year 2011 is going to behold my last semester as an undergrad. The cherry on top of the sundae that I've been building for the last 18 years. The close to the long run (pretty much my whole life non-stop)of being a student, sitting at a desk and listening to someone fill my mind with knowledge. The rest of 2011 is an unlit path as of yet. Right now, I am hoping that it is a path that takes me to Spain to work there, and if it's right, to attain my masters there. 2011 may have other plans for me, so I'm going with an open mind and open arms. It's time to continue to be a student but allow the knowledge ahead to come from sources of life lessons and experiences, not a book that is going to give me the answers.

So as the days go by that path is going to come a little closer to light, and I'll keep you all posted along the way (if you read this make sure you bug me to update haha).

Another good note, in reference to my last post, winter break has given me a great opportunity to catch up with most things on that list, especially sleep!

Well until next time peeps! I hope everyone has a great 2011! Let's rock this. Comments are always appreciated :)

<3 Cat Things to be excited for in 2011
- Graduation: May 25, 2011 @ 6pm
- My 23rd Birthday- NYC!! Apr 2-12
- Spain!! (or whatever else the next phase is)

Nothing in Life is Free

I hadn't realized how long it has been since my last posting, not a great start for someone who wants to blog regularly, but I guess life (and by life i mean school) has taken the fast lane, with far and few stops in between.

These past few weeks have been pretty overwhelming with 6 classes, a part time job, being president of 2 organizations (each with its own dynamics and deficiencies, I've been trying really hard to find the balance I need. The motivation that even though I'm exhausted (mentally and physically) to still keep on and finish that reading assignment for the next class that is going to come much too quickly. Slowly but surely it's coming to me, but this final year of undergrad is definitely whipping me into better shape than I intended.

I sometimes find myself pondering why I jump through these hoops and make life a little more complicated, but I know that is the exact thing that is going to make me come out on top and be a better person. I tried the simple route before and all that came of it was a bored and depressed Cathy. So no more limits just reaching for the sky.

So many new doors have opened to ideas that I hadn't totally considered, but are looking more like possible realities. I'm applying to go to Spain as an ambassador for next year then looking for universities to do my Masters Degree there, but if that doesn't work out perhaps I'll go for Teach for America, or something else that has recently more clearly come into my sight is Law School. After a fantabulous banquet/ awesome networking opportunity I went to this is may be a feasible option for me. Not knowing exactly what is going to go on in my life is kind scary but I guess in that lies the adventure.

To those who have judged me and think I'm living the easy life, it may be time to put on your glasses and realize that nothing in life is free, and though I have been fortunate I have earned my place.

Until next time (hopefully sooner than later)...

<3 Cat

~Comments are always appreciated~ :)

I've been dreaming of a true love's kiss...and a prince I'm hoping comes with it...

Hey Everyone!

So I've survived the first week of classes for my last year of undergrad. It's gonna take some getting used to getting up earlier since I'm not living on campus any more, and I have to take the bus, but it's not that bad in time I'll be a pro. I definitely have a full plate this semester, and a few bumps in the road already, but I have to keep my eye on the prize, in May I'll have my B.A. and be ready (or sorta ready) to take on the world!

As far as the title of this blog, it was the inspiration for pretty much the topic of this entry. The past two nights I have succumbed to watching first "The Wedding Date" and then "Enchanted," and although these movies are really cute, I can't help but feel a tinge of sadness at the end when they walk off into the sunset with their happily ever after, cause it reminds me that I'm without a duet.

Now, I know what you're thinking... "You don't need anyone"..."You're still in school, its better that you're single"..."You're young just have fun, don't worry about those things"..and any other phrase in the same vicinity. And the truth is I find myself saying these phrases to myself whenever that shadow of loneliness is following me.

I am aware of the fact that I have so many dreams and aspirations that are yet to be accomplished, and sharing my life with someone may mean a block in the road for those dreams to come to life. I also know that I am super busy and a relationship right now is pretty out of the question because in order for it to have a chance to be successful time needs to be put into that relationship for it to grow.

All of these thoughts are my brain saying "Cathy be logical, now is not the right time for a boyfriend, keep your eye on the prize." My heart seems to have a different plan though, human nature is taking over and making my heart year for companionship, it wants to have someone to call and say goodnight to, to have someone to hold hands with, to have someone and feel a deeper connection.

But alas, here I am alone writing this blog on a Saturday night. For over a year I have not really bothered with any romantic type relationships, but now I think my heart is noticing and really getting to the point where it's sort of like "Cathy you're overdue, time for a date" lol

So I don't know where the next few months (or years) will lead on this subject, I know I have to be patient, and it will come at the time is right, but somebody tell my heart that on those quiet nights... I'm sure I haven't seen my last romantic comedy, but I think maybe next time we'll try to pick something with action.

Thanks for reading, Comments are always appreciated :)

~Cat

Rosemary Clooney- But Not For Me
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaEICfneRF0

Mi Epiphany :)

Hey hey :)

The school year has started, and I'm back grounded in the 818. As I was getting ready this morning, putting mousse in my much too long (but I want to grow it longer) hair so that it would be more on the "curly" side instead of the "poofy" side, I had an epiphany. I am going to write a book :) I was day dreaming back to when I went to the Latina History Day Conference as a Latina to Watch honoree, and I was thinking of one of the many great women I met that day, Michele Serros. She is a Latina author, who has traveled on many paths of life, but despite all of the people who told her she was crazy with all her big dreams, she's an established author, and wonderful motivational speaker. At that conference I bought her book How to Be A Chicana Role Model (pictured below)





In this book, the stories were so funny I read the book every chance I got (In between all of hard core text books I was reading for school of course ;) ) As I read, I felt that the tone that Michele uses, would be the same way I would tell a story, or react to a certain situation.

So with all of this floating through my mind this morning, it came to me, if Michele Serros can write a book, then so can I, and who knows maybe one day we'll be sharing our books together at some conference.

I've come up with a great title and tag line that I'm going to with hold for now (I know I'm mean, but I'd rather go into it in a little more detail in a later blog), but I'm really excited about this new can of worms I opened up today.

I still plan on being a great inspirational teacher/professor someday, as well as a part time successful stand up comedienne, along with several other aspiration that my heart has called me to.

Well thanks for reading :) Remember comments are always appreciated <3

~Cat

A New Start

Hey Everyone

So it's been a while since I've kept up a blog, so i figure with a new start, it'll motivate me to keep track of everything that goes on. It's the beginning of the end of my undergraduate career at CSUN. I'm President of University Ambassadors and LUCIA(Spanish Club). Double major in Spanish and Liberal Studies (Elementary Education).

So I hope you join me on this journey, with all my thoughts, feelings, opinions, and adventures through this time as I wrap up this chapter and figure out what the next one is.

So as I write this I'm laying on my bed in my room in my APARTMENT (not dorm) just excited for what's to come.

As of this moments I'm going to try my best to leave my insecurities at the door. I know I am a strong gringa-latina woman with an incredible future ahead of me if I so choose for it to be that way.

So look out real world Cathy Smith (yes I'm a latina with THAT last name) is inching closer to taking you over.

Much love
~Cat

P/S: Comments are always greatly appreciated :)