2014 (1) Nike Attitude

Here I am again in front a blank screen for a blank blog post that should soon be filled with witty and charming tales of my daily meandering around. The last time I hit "publish" on this blog was back in August, and even then several posts begin with a sincere apology for my absence since I know (hope) that the tiny little things I write inspire something (laughter, thoughtfulness...etc.) in those who read. This isn't the first time I've sat in front of this screen between my last post and now, it's just the time that I've decided to suck it up and write, the longer you prolong it the guiltier you'll feel. So here I am. I know it's not totally rational that I feel guilty when not writing things in my blog, and of course seeing things like this makes it even more sad.

2014 (0)

This blog started slow because I was crazy in my senior year of college, and I didn't really have time to fit in blogging in the mere 24 hours that we have in a day. Jump to my first year in Spain lots of posts leading up to my departure and the several (mis)adventures that popped up along the way. I was also churning out a lot of posts because I involved myself heavily in the blogging community, and wanted to give my readers something worth coming back to my page for. When I found my niche in Spain, it left less time for me to be blogging about the things I was doing, and instead I was just doing them. Comments and readers dwindled and so did the posting. Now we are in 2014, and I'm not really sure what the fate of this blog is. I don't think I have the heart to close it down completely, because it does give me a space to share my thoughts in a different way than I can on facebook and/or twitter, but I am not quite sure I have the same aspiration I did 3 years ago with having a super popular famous blog where everyone reads it, and not only my family. Even though there is a high number of page views on my blog I'm sure 80% of them are spambots from Russia. I also want to keep writing because I am a bit of a nostalgic person and having something to go back to is important.

It's funny though, I really thought that by living in rural Spain I'd write so much more! There weren't going to be lots of distractions like activities and lots of friends that I had in Madrid, and even a fellow writer friend of mine told me that what a lot of writers want is the time and space to write. That's what I got lots of time and plenty of quiet moments to just sit with a pen and a pad (or a blank blog screen) and just let the words flow from my brain to the page. It hasn't happened quite as I'd planned. I haven't been completely dry on the writing block. My poetry blog has had a few entries, and I'm excited that my Spanish skills are evolving to a place where I can write poems that aren't half bad.

I think part of my lack of motivation/ inspiration is partly due to this "fish out of water" feeling I sometimes have in my current place of living. I hadn't anticipated missing Madrid as much as I do, now that I am so close yet so far, and that in turn has occasionally not really allowed me to connect with the place that I live. It doesn't help that I commute to work so the friends I make at work are far away, and the friends I have where I live I can count on one hand (yeah, it could be much worse--- I've been much worse, but it's my blog and I'll cry if I want to :P ). It doesn't help that I have several moments like this in Navalmoral de la Mata, but I'm growing and learning to not shut down because of it.

But I guess with all things you want to accomplish you kinda have to put yourself in the Nike attitude (Just do it!) So that's what I'm doing--- Just do it (write!) Just do it (be happy!) Just do it (clean your room!... well) lol. I think it has also really helped me to take part in the #100HappyDays challenge. If you're curious to see what it is take a look at my fb album and check out www.100happydays.com.

That's all for now, let's hope you'll be reading me again soon! <3

Ciao Ciao

@CathyArely

A Poetic Absence

So I know 2013 hasn't been my year for blogging... but I'm looking to change that (really, this time).

But my time away from this blog was not totally without words. April is National Poetry Month, and in that I participated in the challenge of creating 30 poems for 30 days. You can see the product of that here.

They say the way you become a better writer is by writing. I know I've made reference to this before, but during the month of April I really found this to be true. Even though it wasn't always easy to find something to write about on a daily basis, and trying not to sound too repetitive or too emo (not sure if I accomplished this one) but all in all I think it was a fabulous experience.

I reached a personal goal, which was to write poetry in Spanish. I churned out dos of my own mini masterpieces.

April is over... and there are still so many more things to write.

Call for YOUR opinion!

Hey hey all,

  So one of my new friends is looking to set up an open mic night, and has asked me to show off some work there (ahh!) So getting things prepared I've brought it down to 5 poems I think I could pull off in public, after polishing and practicing of course! So I'd like to hear what y'all have to say... any and all feedback is greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance! Much Love!

Here are the links to my picks... some have videos others don't as I said before everything is going to need polishing before it is unleashed lol

1. Hungry
2. A Penny for Your Thoughts
3. Cathy's Blues
4. One Picture
5. La Challenge

<3 CathyArely

‎"Aren't we all unfinished? Don't we all need some editing? Aren't we all waiting to be read by someone, praying they will tell us that we make sense?" - Rudy Francisco

Your Bad Luck Is Impressive 3.0

So after a semi-blissful week back to work, I was hit today with something that isn't going to let me feel at ease for the rest of the weekend. 

When I woke up this morning I had an email from the bilingual coordinator at a high school in Mostoles that they had been waiting for me all week, and to let them know if I was going to resign the position then I needed to let them know so that they could replace me.

So all security that I was going to tranquilly be able to work in my adorable curious elementary students in the city center is out the window and filled with doubt about having to go back to the daily grind of fighting to motivate teenagers in an out there community with the not best reputation. 

When I had gone to the administration office they told my my placement without giving my my official letter of appointment, which means there could be a mistake and I get sent over to the other place... although unlikely because I'd like to believe that reason would enter at least a few people's brains and see how I've already started at this other place it's the easiest thing is to stay there.

I replied to the other coordinator telling him the situation, and the game plan now is to wait and see if I'm told to go elsewhere... and if so, try to get my new principal on my side... but we'll see.

Trying to stay optimistic. REALLY trying...

In the meantime you can check out the new Reader Spotlight, or CathyBean Poetry.

Write, Write, Write...Right?

So given the fact that it's been over a month since my last post, the title doesn't make much sense, but despite my minor absence (okay, you can say it...you missed me a whole lot... lol), a bunch of writing has been going on, and even more writing ideas have been forming in my little mind to share with you all. I promise I will fulfill them...eventually.

The reason why I guess I actually gave my self the kick in the pants to get on here and start writing something is because I was reading an article about Carlos Fuentes, one of my favorite author's who passed away this week. In this it gives Carlos' 10 tips for Writers, and number one is right on the ball with what I need to work on.

1. Discipline: Not as an antidote to dreaming but as a necessary regimen to focus on the purpose of your task. It won't write itself. One must dream, but not in a place of working, and never await inspiration. Work in focus, get it done.

So from today I can say I'm going to put effort into getting from the brain waves to the page ( and the added step from the page to the website most of the time too.. lol). A bunch of more poems to post on CathyBean Poetry for April's National Poetry Writing month.

Not last (because I have lots of writing to do.. lol) and certainly not least... I was afforded the great opportunity to be a contributor for MadBudget, a local guide to Madrid. So without further ado my first piece was published this month, and I'm working on a second!!

Anyway, thanks for reading and staying with me everyone, it really does mean a lot. Oh and I gave in, now you can follow me on Twitter @CathyArely.

Much Love,

Cathy

Made for the Movies!

Yep that's right people I'm gonna be famous...or at least that's my hope...sort of. Actually, I don't know what I want lol.

It's kind of funny you don't know what kind of impact you're going to have on the world. My knack for being in different things has always gotten me some sort of recognition even if it's just people remembering my face, coming from a small town helps too. My recent brush with fame actually came from this blog. I was walking into the metro, and this girl goes "I'm sorry to bother you, but are you Cathy?" This definitely caught me off guard since this was Madrid not the Antelope Valley or even CSUN. I warily said yes, and the girl told me that her friend was like my biggest fan, and that she couldn't wait to tell him that she ran into me. Definitely a good boost of self esteem. Also a very good friend of mine showcased me on her blog with one of my latest. So for those fans out there I'll apologize again for my lack of posting updates.

For a long time I've said that I wanted to be that kind of inspirational person that they make a movie about the impact that they've made. What really interests me is the movies like Freedom Writers, Coach Carter, or Stand and Deliver is the influence that these people have made,and that people think that that influence is important. With all of the struggles I've had to overcome in these last (almost) 6 months, it made me laugh at the fact that for so long I've had that dream, but I never really took into account the trials part of it all lol. 

Anyway, in the mean time feel free to check out our New Reader Spotlight for Feb/ March or some CathyBean Poetry. I'll leave you all with a new photo of me and my new haircut. Future famous person, or lawyer, or teacher, or poet, or singer, or comedienne, or whatever else may come my way.

Thanks for reading!

~Cathy

A Little About Me

Hey Hey all,

So I recorded a new poem to go with my A Little About Me section of my blog. Check it out <3

~Cat

The Dream

Hey Hey all!

So after one month of being here in Spain and a series of semi-failed outtings, I still haven't gotten quite into any kind of groove or routine that is even close to the social world I'm used to. Today I decided to let the ink hit the paper just flow. Here what I came up with:

P.S. The Australia reference is based on this-


Non Student Moment of the day-

Scene- me at a bar in an attempt to meet people

Me- Are you from there (pointing to this guy's shirt that says Australia)

Him- Yes, Where are you from?

Me- Los Angeles

Him- Why do Americans always say exactly where they're from?

Me- Well the US is such a big country

Him- Well So is Australia...

Me (in my head)- Well thanks for making me feel like an asshole -_-


Until next time!

~CathyBean

4 Walls

Hey Hey all,

   So as I lay here tying up loose ends getting ready to transport myself from one room to the next room, I thought I'd share a recent work of mine that I did for a project called APOEM (A Piece of Everyone's Mind), which is a spoken word group where people call out others and give them topics for the poem they post the next day. 

    So I've written poetry before, but this was my first attempt at spoken word, and as I explained to my friend the other day in the analogy-- I sing, but I've never rapped before. So without further ado here's my poem, be nice lol.

What is a room, but 4 walls that hold together the meaning of my existence? 

Or nonexistence…

Memories of bouncing on a bed so high it’s like you’re floating on a cloud

Floating away into space

A space, A place where my treasures are held.

Or were held…

Take a deep breath and intake the aroma of coconut lotion and Britney Spear’s fantasy.

A fantasy of being SOMEONE out there in the big bad world.

Without a room but two small suitcases more like cannons filled with clothes and shoes.

Shoes that walk the path unseen 6000 miles to four more walls.

In my mind and on my shelves are the things worth remembering, and the forgotten.

Pass your fingers across the dust on a library of knowledge and emotions over days months and years gone by

And just gone.

Stop and listen closely to the beats these four walls have heard from Pitbull to Phantom of the Opera.

Not forgetting to let the beat rock or bed rock.

Cramming and jamming off the walls into the headphones of my portable mp3 player.

5 senses minus one leaves four.

Taking them all in or all out.

There is no room to be called mine

Except in my mind, which has more walls than four

And the epitome of my international existence.

Thanks for reading/listening/watching! Next broadcast will be from my new home!

~Cat

Flashback

Super short post today...remembering a love that couldn't blossom into what it could have been. Siempre en mente...Have a great day everyone. Comments are always appreciated.

My Song

The beginning
A start
The first night I met you
You had my heart
That wonderful night
Come and gone
I thought it was only a memory
Like a really good song
An unexpected turn
In front of my eyes you are
My heart is full
Amazed at the moments we shared under the stars
Thats where it stays
Where the song remains
Too shy to pull forward
To pursue any gain
Long, hot days
Daydreaming of you
With a hopeful heart
That I was on your mind too
Saving this love
For you to enjoy
Pero cuando es tiempo
Sola estoy
Letting the memory fade away
With the tune playing faintly in the back of my head
Trying to move on
But getting lost in the music instead
A cold icy night
Like the blink of an eye
The cd is thrown out
No more chances to try
The song is over
The world is listening to something new
Now that I'm not under this blanket
I can finally hear it too
My music is a good memory
For now, A fairy tale turned tragedy
The quest is on again
For another sweet melody